Meg here! Today I want to talk about “Going to sleep alone.” I’m very lucky, I have a brilliant network of friends and when I posted to my Facebook Status “Going to sleep alone Sucks.” A very brilliant friend and amazing television writer commented underneath “Not as much as it sucks if you’re just sleeping next to someone to make you sleep easier. Find someone that treats you right babydoll.”
I read her comment and then smiled through the tears.
My ex-husband was not a bad guy-he wasn’t one iota of bad. He himself will even admit he was “absent.” He loved to work and was wildly successful. He bought me a 4 carat ring, a mercedes and a gorgeous house in the hills. It wasn’t like he was some old coot. He did all of this by age 28 and we were together forever. BUT through all of the material posessions and through all of the drive-our marriage became more of a business then a marriage.
Do I appreciate all of the hard work and sacrifice it took to sustain our lifestyle? Of course I do. Did I resent the lifestyle as I went to sleep alone every night? Hell YES.
I am at the point where all I need is a hammock and backpack. I am going to be 33 years old and living my life in complete reverse. I’ve had the $10,000 vacations and the $2,000 handbags-it didn’t make me happy. I’m glad I learned this lesson at thirty-three. I’ve talked to some women that didn’t learn it until age sixty.
While Megken and I cannot be an “official couple” I really don’t give a toss. He writes on the site without me asking. When I tell him good news about stuff he is supportive. I don’t get a “label”, I get something better.
I get genuine support and love and that wraps warmer then my limited edition Burberry trench.
Was it easy to walk away from all of the comfort? Um, no. Am I a better and truer person for it? 100% Yes. I feel badly for the friends I have (and their husbands) that just stay because it is “easy.” Yeah, they have the most expensive lunch ever at Da Silvano’s-but then they still have to go home and they go home hungry.
I’ve never had children so the break was easier for me to make. I only had myself to “save.” Not to save myself from failure, distress or abuse-to save myself from complacency.
Once I became responsible for myself my whole universe became productive. I am slowly starting to realize that “Yes, I can do anything I put my mind to.” I became driven, I woke up.
I’m asking all of you to remember what used to make you alive and what you wanted. It’s not too late-get out of your comfort zone. Seriously, we have one life, shake that shit up and go for it. Save yourself from complacency! It’s the best thing I have ever done for myself.
There’s this really popular quote “What would you do if you knew you could not fail?” That’s a question we deserve to ask ourselves. We know we’re not coming back so why not go for it? There is another quote I absolutely love, it is my favorite. From Miss Lucille Ball (oh how I LOVE LUCY!) “I’d rather regret the things I’ve done than regret the things I haven’t done!”
Tonight-I’m going to sleep alone-I’m OK with it!
We are our own worst critic! Come on! We need to support each other! What would you do if you knew you could not fail? Don’t sleepwalk through your life! Leave with no regrets!