Gigi here! I’m not certain why I disclose major embarrassments of my life in this forum, but perhaps it is because I am so very comfortable with and trusting of you wonderful women. Seriously–I never dreamed a group could be as supportive, brilliant, hysterical, and kind!
Let’s rewind to my teen years. I was a majorette and going to perform in one of the larges t parades in the area. Everyone went–my boyfriend was going to be there with his friends (okay, I was in love with him but always believed in keeping my options open). I was decked out in a black mini skirt in size “Malibu Barbie” and had a black top adorned with gold sequins. My boots were polished and my tassels perfectly fluffed. I had the dance routine perfected so that I didn’t hit myself in the head yet again with the baton and cause a concussion.
I saw my sister immediately after a flawless performance. She is a short woman, barely five feet tall, but she still wields a lot of power because of her being older. I asked how I did, expecting her to fawn. Her reaction? “Gigi, what the heck did you do with your mascara? There are tarantulas on your eyes and I don’t know how you can hold head up without being a hunchback.” I wish she had told me what she really thought! Actually, I was a spiked Goth before it was fashionable or Scarlett O’Hara with her lashes on steroids! I realized what she meant–more is not necessarily good. I had kept applying coats before the parade.
Now I am on a continuous search for a fabulous drugstore mascara to share with you, but I am in therapy for “Fringaphobia.” I am seeking products for volume and length and am given to panic attacks by the overflowing shelves and displays in drugstores (however, not my nearby drugstore, as I believe they are selling rancid cake mascara from 1954). Choosing drugstore mascara was once easy–there was Maybelline’s basic, “Great Lash” in a scandalous pink and green tube, Cover Girl’s waterproof “Marathon,” and some others, but not thousands. These days the feminine colors scream, “You’re a girly girl and know you have to have me!” Black, gold, and red echo, “Christmas is coming, so don’t be left in the dust without us to sparkle!” Double mascaras summon me to resemble Penelope Cruz with fringe that could sweep a floor like an industrial-sized broom. I finally grabbed a vivid yellow and purple tube of Maybelline’s “Colossal Volum’ Express” in “Glam Back” because it looks like a highlighter (around $6.99) and reading is a habit I intend to regain.
So breathe deeply, and try an eyelash curler to get the most from this surprisingly good product. Just say to yourself, “I’m the one with the brain and will learn to use this; I will not see it as a torture device left over from the Spanish Inquisition.”
When I first applied it, our Terrier Skittles–the one who uses makeup and still wishes to have Tobermans with the Doberman across the street–was sitting near me. I caught a whiff of something and said, “Dinner didn’t quite agree with you, did it, little girl?” But there was a continuous faint reek and I said, “Okay, I’ll get you a Greenie bone” before I realized that the foul smell came from the mascara, not the dog. The scent is a detriment.
The brush is patent-pending and longer and chubbier than many, so filled with the formula that you barely see the bristles. Maybelline promises lashes nine times more voluminous than with others. I was surprised at how well my lashes became fuller while being defined on the first application. It contains Collagen to boost and it works. There was minimal clumping and flaking and thus the mascara comb I had was used, but I gained both length and volume. Had I woken up in Oz?
A gorgeous reader of this site, Indi (Indigo), told me that the key to making oscillating mascaras work is to use them slowly. That made me think, and the same applies to any mascara. Take your time. Don’t look at the clock. Don’t drive with your knees and put it on in the rear-view mirror of your car on the way to work. Patience is indeed a virtue, as Indi reminded me.
With one coat, I had noticeable, come-hither lashes without a gaudy look. A second coat would be too much for me and probably anyone with short and fair lashes, but I’m happy. If you do want a second go-round, do it quickly, as it dries almost immediately. The would-be highlighter did indeed brighten my makeup collection and eyes! If I sing “You Light Up My Life,” please shoot me . . .
What drugstore mascara makes your button twirl? Please let us know!
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